Fred the elfling has graciously agreed to be our foreign correspondent and ask some of the tough questions.

Todayís interview: Henry the Innkeeper the proprietor of Henryís.


Fred:Henry, people want to know.Can you get a Hamburger at Henryís?

Henry: I donít know why folks think that we ainít up to that.Course you can.We have cows.Weíve got a meat grinder.Come on by and weíll whip up a basket for you.Mind you, not so cheap as in other parts as I hear about.But we only have fresh meat, home baked rolls, and fresh cut taters fried up waffle style with my own secret spice.Only eight shillings a basket.Like to see this Ďhappy foodí person beat that.


Fred: What would be a more economical lunch at Henryís?

Henry:Well, most folks stopping by for a pint at lunch do take a bite.We can fix you up with a ham sandwich and a slice of apple pie for a crown.That or the daily special.Shepardís pie, Bangerís and Mash, maybe a steak and kidney pie, whatever the misses is in the mood for.


Fred: Youíre married then?

Henry:Oh yes.Me and the Misses run the place.She donít cotton to the company in the room though, so she usually works in the kitchen.


Fred: Henry, your Inn has been accused of being a house of ill repute.Any comment on that?

Henry: What rot.Weíve got a friendly staff at Henryís, thatís all.Friendly but none of that sort.Mind you I wont say as there arenít a few soldiers who come by Henryís looking for a bit of a cuddle.I was in the army myself you know.I know a man gets lonely posted away from home.But there ainít no whoring at Henryís.


Fred: Isnít it true that Lord Darras has lodged complaints with you over this issue?

Henry:Lord Darras is a proper gentleman.Iíll tell you what I told him.Man expects to run an Inn in a remote part of the world, he best not be too curious about what folks do at night in their rooms.Long as they donít disturb the other guests.Been some queer things happen with his lot, so I donít see as heís one to complain on that score.We just have lots of young people around is all.Heís got young men.Iíve got young girls.They take to each other now and then.Perfectly natural.Now some of my girls arenít as careful as they ought to be around the young men, but then some of his lot arenít as gentlemanly as he wants them to be.People is people is all.Thereís been a time or two things havenít worked out so well.But weíve had a few marriages too.


Fred: Are Soldiers your only customers?

Henry: Lord no.We do a fair trade with them, but itís not so steady with them as Iíd like.But weíve got other folks as come by.Folks stop off for a pint on the way to Vonair, Tuckís ferry or maybe even Wallsingham or Bristol Springs.Weíve got our share of locals too mind you.Thereís a couple of farms about and then thereís the woodsmen.They like a pint and a bit o news themselves.


Fred:Do many fairy folk come to the inn?

Henry: Now and then.Dwarves mostly.They are the most social of that lot.†† Donít do much trade with elves.I try and keep a bit of bear claw for the trolls.Keeps them social.


Fred:So Trolls are partial to bear meat, eh?

Henry: Donít be daft.Bear claw is a sweet.Like a donut or a pastry.Good seller for us.Woodsmen donít get much sweets.No bear in it at all.Trolls has got a powerful sweet tooth.†††


Fred: What are the most popular drinks at Henry's?

Henry: Beer and Cider.We do a fair trade in Rum and Mead as well.


Fred: By Cider, you mean 'Hard Cider' right, i.e. the fermented alcoholic beverage made from apple juice?

Henry: Right, though in the Stewardship we take pride in the quality of our water supplies and non-alcoholic drinks are becoming more popular.Apple juice, Lemonade, Sarsaparilla, and Sun Tea are popular.


Fred:What surprises first time travelers most about Henry's?

Henry: The quality of our bathrooms.The flushing toilet was actually invented in 1596.Plumbing isn't under the ban.We cater to folks from Roman settlements that are used to running water and hot baths.We don't disappoint at Henry's.††


Fred: I think that about covers it.Check back next month for more news from the boarder lands.


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